Cyril Wheaton Combined with being a homeschooler, a self-imposed de-integrator, and having the entire house empty (most of my sisters have already left the nest), my internal thoughts have magnified to deafening volumes. As a result, the value I now place on introspection knows no bounds, because the longer I can think about how and why I tick, the more order I realize I can bring to my mind. Whenever I was faced with insecurities or nagging concerns I used to just change stations, but now the distractions are off the air, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Whether I’m scrolling through Reddit silently debating every horrible take and rag of slanted chatter, or straining over college essays trying to find the line between authenticity and embellished fancies, knowing exactly how you think, why you make your decisions, understanding your priorities, can be accomplished through introspection.
College apps are the time to start editing your life into a reputable portfolio. As I’m choosing which pictures to cut out, I find myself looking over all 17 years of my life wondering just how much of it has been spent valuably. What was a tired chore has suddenly become relevant, and what seemed special is actually just clutter. Have I made any meaningful connections? How much has actually been accomplished? How has my thinking process changed in the last two years?
I’ve visited all these questions and others at least once, but that’s the problem. I can never lock on a perfectly formed report for myself because my mind can’t lay all the points out at once. It needs to be articulated completely, cohesively, and remembered. Otherwise I’ll revisit the same question again and again with a new angle (or angles I forgot I thought about) each time and waste even more time. Introspection can realign my mind, but to keep it aligned it needs to be combined with writing.
The end goal of The Cereal Box is to transfer every piece of internal dialogue out of my head and onto paper. To tie up every sheave and clear the fields so to speak. Writing “Present and Accounted For?” has already taken down the chatter by a considerable amount so I’m expecting similar success with the rest of what’s pending. In a way I suppose it’s lucky that my beloved sisters all left for college. If I were older or they had stayed home I don’t think I ever would’ve gotten enough isolation to sit quietly and think. Well actually I could get that if I were an only child, but that’s no fun.
